Ch ch changes.

I changed up my blog--this is probably not what I would have picked because I found several others on different sites that were way cute....but something wasn't working right and they were blurry. So green and blue it is. :)

Also--I was editing some of the pictures on here and NONE of them are current, and I am on my work pc so I decided to put this one up because it cracks me up. This was just taken a couple of weeks ago and it's typical us. Me with red eyes and him not looking at the camera.

The one where I complain a lot, Read at your own risk.

My IVF didn't work. That's not news, I told you that last week--but it sucked and it still mildly okay moderately sucks...but to my excitement the suckage just got worse. Let me explain.

I have a lot of insurance. Well I have primary and secondary and they are both through the same carrier its just that one is my company and the other is my husband's company. That sounds like a good thing...just wait for it. We were lucky (or so we thought) that this particular insurance company (not mentioning any names) covered MOST of our IVF. We were out 10% of the treatment and all of the medicine...which is still a lot of money in our eyes, but could have been so much worse. So--IVF doesn't work, I'm all "woe is me" and then BAM, we get a bill for a big chunk of money that we weren't supposed to have to pay. Now, that would be bad news on any day...but now that I have already paid SO much money and it didn't work...I really don't want to give anyone any MORE money for something that was a colossal waste of time. Long story short....they are filing stuff on secondary and then rejecting it because they can tell that I have primary insurance somewhere....yes...that somewhere is with them, but it's whatev. So..I have been on the phone all bloody morning dealing with that nonsense. Fun fun.

Insurance companies are STOOOOPID. Sorry if you work for one, but only just a little bit sorry.

Starting Over

Yay a new week! Time to put that horrible one (last week) behind me. I had a really great weekend although I absolutely fried myself in Mom's swimming pool. So, although it hurts to wear clothing, I chose to do it anyway...haha and here I am back at work and making a list of stuff that I WILL GET CAUGHT UP ON before noon on Friday.

I don't know if this is normal or not, but since I stopped taking PIO shots, my stomach has been sort of upset and I haven't had much of an appetite. I could do without the stomach thing but the appetite can STAY AWAY. I've got about 10 IVF pounds to drop and another 10-15 that I wanted to drop before IVF came about. I'm off to a good start so far. :)

I may be a little absent from the blog world with posts and comments. I will be reading though and I am still SO excited for everyone who is pregnant right now and for my bloggy friend who found out the sex of her baby last week (you know who you are) and for my very good IRL friend J who will most likely be having a baby girl either this week or next week--and I can't wait to see good news from those of you who are still in my situation!!!!

Have a great week!
~Ash

Thank you.

Thanks to everyone for your kind words. I had a pretty good meltdown the day we got the call and I am just ready to move on to Plan B, whatever that is. We have 5 frozen embryos so all hope is not lost. We'll probably wait until later on in the year to do the FET. We need a break, and we have a vacation coming up in August that I do NOT want to ruin with stressing over baby making. Now we get to fight with insurance--I don't think they know who they are messing with right now. ;-)

List of things that have happened since Beta:
1-amazing frozen margarita at my fave Mexican restaurant
1-super long 4-wheeler ride involving a creek
1-2 hour session of laying out on my back deck
1-sunburn
3-super hot, super long baths
1-box of black hair dye :)

I'm going to survive I think.

BFN

Apparently 80% isn't THAT great of odds.

List of things I will be doing starting tomorrow:
Drinking Caffiene, major amounts of caffeine.
Taking.Long.Hot.Baths
Laying in the sun (a lot)
Not planning my evenings around a needle to the butt.
RIDING MY 4-Wheeler
Drinking margaritas. Frozen ones.
Playing with my huge, jumping dogs.
Dieting
Running/Working out
Doing my job instead of surfing the web about baby stuff all day.
Throwing out a Sharps Container full of needles
Spending my money on fun things instead of IVF.

Hey--who said there isn't a silver lining?

Still waiting....

7dp5dt

Still waiting. Still haven't POAS. Holding strong. :)

Yep...I' m waiting....(and an update)

2dp5dt

I'm pretty calm actually. It's weird how calm I really am. Patience is not really my virtue (haha) usually--but I think I am completely worn out on being nervous, like maybe I physically do not have it in me to be that way anymore. Some of you have asked me when my beta is--and I do know the answer to that, but I am not disclosing that at this time. In fact, this will probably be my last post until I know the result. Why? My Mom reads this, and my sister, and a few of my close friends and I have already been robbed of being able to completely surprise people with a pregnancy announcement. I mean, the cat's out of the bag--sort of. So hub and I just decided that we will keep that date to ourselves. For those of you who have done IVF you can probably narrow it down quite a bit anyway although the exact date is not what I originally thought it would be. I just want to have some element of surprise IF it happens. And if not--I need some time to get a grip before I announce that part as well. :( Which reminds me? How many of you POAS before your beta and if so--what day past transfer day did you do it? I don't know if I will do it for sure--but I am thinking I might want to be prepared for beta day. Does that make sense?

Today is my first day back to work since the the day before retrieval. I have so much to do and I am blogging. Lol--what else is new?
So I would love to hear what you guys have to say. Especially about the POAS part...and I will update you all as soon as I have the info. :)
PS: I am still reading--even though I am not writing!!!

P.S.S.--They were able to freeze all 5 of the remaining embryos. Thank you Lord!!!

~Ash