Because I'm really 14 years old, just with wrinkles.

Do you have any pets?	3 dogs, see -->
What color shirt are you wearing?	Black, Pink and Silver
Name three things that are physically close to you:	Diet Coke (always), ink pen, envelope opener
What is the last book you read?	Deeper Than Dead (nightmares for a month)
Are you or were you a good student?	Decent
What's your favorite sport?	Softball
Do you enjoy sleeping late?	If I can sleep past 7:30 these days, I am so excited. As a teenager I could sleep til noon.
What's the weather like right now?	HOT
Who tells the best jokes?	Besides me? Ok, I don't tell jokes.
What was the last thing you dreamed about?	It was random and about someone I went to high school with.
Do you drive? If so, have you ever crashed?	Yes to both. Nothing serious.
Do you believe in karma?	I wish it on people, but I'm not sure anything comes of it. haha
Do you believe in luck?	Not really
Do you like your eggs scrambled or sunny side up?	Mmm, eggs. I just like them any way that's edible.
Do you collect anything? If so, what?	Ninja Turtles. Ok, nothing.
Are you proud of yourself?	Occasionally
Are you reliable?	I like to think so.
Have you ever given money to a bum?	I stay away from bums. I am female and young and scared of my own shadow.
What's your favorite food?	Mexican
Have you ever had a secret admirer?	It wouldn't be a secret if I knew, durrrrr.
Do you like the smell of gasoline?	Nah
Do like to draw?	Doodle would be the word. Hearts, flowers...I told you I am 14.
What's your favorite invention?	Tequila :) or electricity
Is your room messy?	If my husband is in the vicinity, then yes.
What do you like better: oranges or apples?	I like both.
Do you give in easily?	It just depends.
Are you a good guesser?	I guess, haha get it?
Can you read other people's expressions?	If I know them pretty well, but not just a random person's expressions.
Are you a bully?	I wish.
Do you have a job?	SIGH, I am here right now. Working hard, obviously.
What time did you wake up this morning?	5:15 am.
What did you eat for breakfast this morning?	crackers at like 10am
When was the last time you showered?	This morning.
What do you plan on doing tomorrow?	Working, wishing my life away, elbowing myself in the ribs.
What's your favorite day of the week and why?	Saturday. No worky.
Do you have any nicknames?	Ashhole.
Have you ever been scuba diving?	No
What's your least favorite color?	Hmm, tan or gold or something like that.
Is there someone you have been constantly thinking about? If yes, who?	Edward the vampire
Would you ever go skydiving?	Nope
What toothpaste do you use?	Aquafresh Extreme Clean
Do you enjoy challenges?	Not particularly.
What's the worst injury you have had?	Nothing major, broken arm, stitches here and there.
What's the last movie you saw?	Alice In Wonderland :)
What do you want to know about the future?	babiezzzzzzzzzz, yes or no???
What does your last text message say?	"Only if you take me with you."
Who was the last person you spoke over the phone to?	Hubby (I hate the word hubby)
What's your favorite school subject?	English
What's your least favorite school subject?	Math
Would you rather have money or love?	I choose both. I can do that because I'm whiny and infertile. Deal with it.
What is your dream vacation?	I really wanna go to Ireland. This is a recent decision.
What is your favorite animal?	Muh DOGS!!!!
Do you miss anyone right now?	I miss food and sleep...that's all that consumes my mind at the moment. Oh and unbuttoning my pants. I want that pretty badly too.
What's the last sporting event you watched?	T-ball, I suppose.
Do you need to do laundry?	Nope, laundry is DUN.
Where were you when 9/11 happened?	High School
What do you do when vending machines steal your money?	Kick it. Say a curse word, and then hunt down the person who will be refunding me. (whoever is standing close to me)
Have you ever caught a butterfly?	I don't see the point.
What color are your bed sheets?	Light blue
What's your ringtone?	Depends on who is calling.
Who was the last person to make you laugh?	A fellow blogger
Do you have any obsessions right now?	Baby making of course, and Heath Bars
Do you like things that glow in the dark?	I just don't care.
What's your favorite fruity scent?	Pink Grapefruit
Do you watch cartoons?	King of the Hill, that's all.
Have you ever sat on a roof?	Yes
Have you ever been to a different country?	Mexico, The Bahamas
Name three things in the world you dislike:	Now is not the time to be asking me this, I'm cranky.
Name three people in the world you dislike:	Kathy Griffin, Rosie O' Donnell, Obama (boo, hiss--hey it's my blog)
Has a rumor ever been spread about you?	You betcha.
Do you like sushi?	I'm not eating that crap!
Do you believe in magic?	Nah
Do you hold grudges?	I'm afraid so, maybe a little.

Uneventful is good.

Is it really Monday again? Like for real? My eyes are only 1/2 way open, so it must be. I left the house early for Starbucks this morning, because I thought that would help wake me up--but it didn't. Idk why, but I just couldn't sleep last night. It was all stormy and usually that's good sleeping weather for me, but not this time.
My weekend was good--no drama, no stress...uneventful is good. Left work at 11 on Friday and went shopping with my Mammaw. Got some Yellowbox's, a new tie dye purse, 2 watches, and some earrings and ate at the wonderful BlazeNBurrito. Then I spent the rest of the afternoon and a good part of Saturday laying out in Mom's pool. We did some experimenting with my hair, haha--I had planned to dye it black (again) and then put some blue underneath. I know that sounds emo, but I had a picture that I was going by of Korey from Skillet and it would have looked really cool. Anyway, the blue did not show up over the black, and I am NOT bleaching it to put blue on it...so that was that. My husband loves the black hair, so we'll go with this for a while. As long as I have a tan it shouldn't be too bad--but for winter we are going to have to lighten it up a bit or I will look like Night of the Living Dead.
Rented some movies at the Redbox and then forced myself to stay home Sunday and clean and do homework, which I did accomplish. Hallelujah. Anyway, I have been wanting to watch Alice in Wonderland because I am a colossal dork so I rented that and I liked it. :) And hub would NOT watch it with me, haha. We also rented From Paris with Love and Funny People. It was a wide combination of drama, crude comedy and computer animations.
Back to work....not wanting to wish my life away, but hoping it goes by fast because I have a 3 1/2 day weekend up ahead.
Countdown to vacation: 51 days

Jeez.

Once you post something on here, there's no getting rid of it. I did a post earlier where I whined a lot, and then I decided that I was too whiny so I took it off--but it has been brought to my attention that it's still there somewhat. Anyway, this particular post is stupid...but it will replace the old one. :)

Holy Mother of Excitement! (update)

My IRL and Bloggy friend, Jessica is having a baby tomorrow!!!! Welcome to the world Baby Sophia!!! Everyone please pray for a smooth labor and a healthy baby and Momma!!!!


Update:
Sweet little baby that I have not gotten to see in person yet, which is not okay...
Congrats Jess--she is beautiful!!! I won't give all the birth details, you have your own blog for that, but I thought I'd show her off a little. :)

Ch ch changes.

I changed up my blog--this is probably not what I would have picked because I found several others on different sites that were way cute....but something wasn't working right and they were blurry. So green and blue it is. :)

Also--I was editing some of the pictures on here and NONE of them are current, and I am on my work pc so I decided to put this one up because it cracks me up. This was just taken a couple of weeks ago and it's typical us. Me with red eyes and him not looking at the camera.

The one where I complain a lot, Read at your own risk.

My IVF didn't work. That's not news, I told you that last week--but it sucked and it still mildly okay moderately sucks...but to my excitement the suckage just got worse. Let me explain.

I have a lot of insurance. Well I have primary and secondary and they are both through the same carrier its just that one is my company and the other is my husband's company. That sounds like a good thing...just wait for it. We were lucky (or so we thought) that this particular insurance company (not mentioning any names) covered MOST of our IVF. We were out 10% of the treatment and all of the medicine...which is still a lot of money in our eyes, but could have been so much worse. So--IVF doesn't work, I'm all "woe is me" and then BAM, we get a bill for a big chunk of money that we weren't supposed to have to pay. Now, that would be bad news on any day...but now that I have already paid SO much money and it didn't work...I really don't want to give anyone any MORE money for something that was a colossal waste of time. Long story short....they are filing stuff on secondary and then rejecting it because they can tell that I have primary insurance somewhere....yes...that somewhere is with them, but it's whatev. So..I have been on the phone all bloody morning dealing with that nonsense. Fun fun.

Insurance companies are STOOOOPID. Sorry if you work for one, but only just a little bit sorry.

Starting Over

Yay a new week! Time to put that horrible one (last week) behind me. I had a really great weekend although I absolutely fried myself in Mom's swimming pool. So, although it hurts to wear clothing, I chose to do it anyway...haha and here I am back at work and making a list of stuff that I WILL GET CAUGHT UP ON before noon on Friday.

I don't know if this is normal or not, but since I stopped taking PIO shots, my stomach has been sort of upset and I haven't had much of an appetite. I could do without the stomach thing but the appetite can STAY AWAY. I've got about 10 IVF pounds to drop and another 10-15 that I wanted to drop before IVF came about. I'm off to a good start so far. :)

I may be a little absent from the blog world with posts and comments. I will be reading though and I am still SO excited for everyone who is pregnant right now and for my bloggy friend who found out the sex of her baby last week (you know who you are) and for my very good IRL friend J who will most likely be having a baby girl either this week or next week--and I can't wait to see good news from those of you who are still in my situation!!!!

Have a great week!
~Ash

Thank you.

Thanks to everyone for your kind words. I had a pretty good meltdown the day we got the call and I am just ready to move on to Plan B, whatever that is. We have 5 frozen embryos so all hope is not lost. We'll probably wait until later on in the year to do the FET. We need a break, and we have a vacation coming up in August that I do NOT want to ruin with stressing over baby making. Now we get to fight with insurance--I don't think they know who they are messing with right now. ;-)

List of things that have happened since Beta:
1-amazing frozen margarita at my fave Mexican restaurant
1-super long 4-wheeler ride involving a creek
1-2 hour session of laying out on my back deck
1-sunburn
3-super hot, super long baths
1-box of black hair dye :)

I'm going to survive I think.

BFN

Apparently 80% isn't THAT great of odds.

List of things I will be doing starting tomorrow:
Drinking Caffiene, major amounts of caffeine.
Taking.Long.Hot.Baths
Laying in the sun (a lot)
Not planning my evenings around a needle to the butt.
RIDING MY 4-Wheeler
Drinking margaritas. Frozen ones.
Playing with my huge, jumping dogs.
Dieting
Running/Working out
Doing my job instead of surfing the web about baby stuff all day.
Throwing out a Sharps Container full of needles
Spending my money on fun things instead of IVF.

Hey--who said there isn't a silver lining?

Still waiting....

7dp5dt

Still waiting. Still haven't POAS. Holding strong. :)

Yep...I' m waiting....(and an update)

2dp5dt

I'm pretty calm actually. It's weird how calm I really am. Patience is not really my virtue (haha) usually--but I think I am completely worn out on being nervous, like maybe I physically do not have it in me to be that way anymore. Some of you have asked me when my beta is--and I do know the answer to that, but I am not disclosing that at this time. In fact, this will probably be my last post until I know the result. Why? My Mom reads this, and my sister, and a few of my close friends and I have already been robbed of being able to completely surprise people with a pregnancy announcement. I mean, the cat's out of the bag--sort of. So hub and I just decided that we will keep that date to ourselves. For those of you who have done IVF you can probably narrow it down quite a bit anyway although the exact date is not what I originally thought it would be. I just want to have some element of surprise IF it happens. And if not--I need some time to get a grip before I announce that part as well. :( Which reminds me? How many of you POAS before your beta and if so--what day past transfer day did you do it? I don't know if I will do it for sure--but I am thinking I might want to be prepared for beta day. Does that make sense?

Today is my first day back to work since the the day before retrieval. I have so much to do and I am blogging. Lol--what else is new?
So I would love to hear what you guys have to say. Especially about the POAS part...and I will update you all as soon as I have the info. :)
PS: I am still reading--even though I am not writing!!!

P.S.S.--They were able to freeze all 5 of the remaining embryos. Thank you Lord!!!

~Ash